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IGNITE Her Comeback Season

Here we are at the beginning of another season. This episode finds us at the beginning of a Spring season, which is always refreshing! The energy that pulses through the air during springtime brings hope, transformation, revival, and reset. Reflection, surrounded with positivity, faith, and anticipation, brings forth new plans, mental resets, and clarity. In this episode of IGNITE, we are going to take this time to reflect, revive, and come fierce into our comeback season!

Take a moment to reflect back on a past struggle. Consider a season of your life that was really tough to get through. Maybe it was a time when you were challenged and pushed to your breaking point. Maybe it was a time you never left your cave, physically, mentally, and emotionally. Explore the feelings that arise. Don’t encumber the feelings, just observe them. Notice the struggle, the hardship, the battle. Briefly hold space for this time of your life. If you are able, write down the words that come to mind as you visualize your challenging time. Make a small list of the emotions you are noticing- disappointment, fear, anxiety, mistrust, overwhelm, inadequacy, depression, etc. It is challenging in itself to hold safe space for past struggles, trauma, feelings, and emotions. It is challenging to keep them in the past, not allow them into the present moment. Gabor Maté, M.D. explains the requirements for emotional competence. We must have:

the capacity to feel our emotions, so that we are aware when we are experiencing stress;
the ability to express our emotions effectively and thereby to assert our needs and to maintain the integrity of our emotional boundaries;
the facility to distinguish between psychological reactions that are pertinent to the present situation and those that represent residue from the past. What we want and demand from the world needs to conform to our present needs, not to unconscious, unsatisfied needs from childhood. If distinctions between past and present blur, we will perceive loss or the threat of loss where none exists; and
the awareness of those genuine needs that do require satisfaction, rather than their repression for the sake of gaining the acceptance or approval of others.*

He states, “Stress occurs in the absence of these criteria, and it leads to the disruption of homeostasis.” In my words, it leads to the disruption of our balance. When we lose the capacity to feel our emotions, because who has the time to meddle in all of their past tribulations. When we lose the ability to express our emotions, because we have to keep it all together to keep the boat afloat. When our brain cannot distinguish that this is a present situation, not a past one. Or, we can’t identify our genuine, unique needs that require fulfillment for that emotional balance. We feel stress. Our bodies feel stress. Our minds feel stress. And, it shows up in different ways. It leaks out in a headache or pulled muscle that requires rest. It puts on an appearance in inflammation requiring a routine massage. It presents itself in a sarcastic remark, eye roll, or glare that ends with an argument and resentment. It is a silent retreat within and a mindfulness retreat in nature. It is a two hour cryfest and hot chocolate with a best friend. Emotional competence is what we need to foster and flourish in ourselves and in our girls. It is what we need to balance our emotions, stress, minds, bodies, and souls. In doing so, we bloom hope, liberation, and peace.

Take this last moment to recall the struggle you meditated on a few moments ago. Bring it back to the safe space in the past, where you observe from the safe distance. Put it in your rearview mirror. Imagine with me, you are sitting in your car alone and a long stretch of road is in front of you. The scenery is of your liking- a country road lined with trees and fields, a cityscape with lights and bustling activity, an oceanside view with sandy beaches. Turn the radio on and you hear this song, “Comeback Season” by Tiffany Nacol. You hear her sing: “Your setback was just a setup for your comeback. This season, you’re rising stronger than ever!... It’s my comeback season and I’m taking back my name. Every tear I cry. Every night I pray. Wasn’t wasting time. It was making way… They counted you out, but watch this comeback. This is YOUR season to step into authority and take back everything the enemy tried to steal.”** That struggle in your rearview mirror stays there and you now see the strength you have, the power within you, the fierceness in your soul that survived. You are empowered, amazed, and restored. Recall who gave you the capacity to really feel what you were going through. Remind yourself of the outlet you used to express your emotions. In your comeback season, what revealed your true strength and endurance? Who showed up for your unique and special needs that boosted you forward? These are most important to write down. Write them down anywhere and everywhere. They are your PACEs (Protective and Compensatory Experiences) that pull you through your struggles, challenges, and deepest pits. They are your comeback season!

Every girl struggles with something. Every girl has challenges she faces everyday. Every girl feels defeated, lost, and broken. Just. Like. Us. YOU are each of your girl’s protective and compensatory experiences. YOU are her capacity, ability, facility, and awareness of the true strength and resiliency within herself. YOU ARE HER COMEBACK SEASON!!!

*Mate, Gabor. When the Body Says No: Exploring the Stress-Disease Connection. Wiley, 2011.

**"Comeback Seasond." Comeback Season, , 2025, CD Single.

Shayla A is the Coach Mentor for Girls on the Run Greater Kansas City. Her background comes from the classroom, coaching, day treatment schools, wellness, and advocating for children with special needs. She enjoys empowering and advocating for girls and coaches

in every challenge and celebration. Connect with her for support and assistance this season via call, text, or email. shaylaaranda@gmail.com | 816-284-9770

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